I will now tell you a little story about my experience with the “Baptism of the Holy Spirit”.
There was a time in my life when I sought God with fervor and effort due to a deep emotional and Spiritual black hole in myself. Words do not give proper credence to any God given revelation of soul. Therefore, I shall use metaphors and allegories in an attempt to convey to you my experience. English has no words for the supernatural feelings the Holy Spirit has passed through me.
I was living in San Antonio, Texas at the age of 29. I frequently passed a little church on the way to and from my apartment. I had become a born again Christian two years prior and yes, my life improved quite a bit, I was no longer a slave to drugs and alcohol. Nevertheless, I was a struggling Christian. I suffered with anxiety attacks and intense stress in spite of being born again and water baptized. I was trying desperately to be obedient to the God I so badly needed to know. I read the Bible often and did abstain from all drugs both prescribed and illegal. I sought God through prayer regularly, I so needed relief from my anxiety. Suddenly the feelings of paralyzing fear would come over me and all I knew how to do was attempt to escape all feelings. I isolated myself from everyone. My husband at the time wanted to help but he could do nothing to relieve my fear. What is anxiety except intense unexpressed fear? No one was able to ease the repercussions of my emotional trauma.
I recall every time I road by this little neighborhood church I felt drawn to it. For nearly one year, I passed it by thinking: “Someday I will attend this church.” Finally, one morning I went to the little Baptist Church. I do not remember much about the sermon except the lovely old man with white hair who was the preacher. After the morning service, as I was leaving I met a woman standing in the greeters doorway of the church. She touched my chest right where all my pain and fears felt stuck. She then said to me; “Come to the evening service, The Lord has something for you.” What an understatement! I really believed her for some reason and was intrigued by what she said; I left that church with the hope I would receive something from God in the evening service.
My faith started with a belief in God, The Father. I was beginning to understand the idea of Jesus the son of God but it was difficult. I kept reading the Bible hoping something would click. The whole idea of a sacrificial lamb seemed extreme to me, I really did not get it, though I wanted to. The woman who I now know as Sister Petty struck my interest. I went to that seven-o’clock service as she suggested at the little Baptist church.
I entered the church and saw only five or six people including the sweet elderly, white haired pastor. He was elderly but very alert, spiritually proficient and empathic. Sister Petty the woman from the morning service was there, I later learned she was a minister, missionary, and founder of many churches. I saw a young man and his mother; I remember being surprised that they allowed a guy with long hair in the church. These people where giving their testimonies of what God had done for them.
After the testimonies where given they asked me if I wanted to receive prayer. The only religious organization I had experienced prior to this other than my brief baptism in water at The Church of Christ was The Kingdom Hall and they never publicly prayed for me. I did not know what to expect, but I opted for prayer and boy am I glad I did. They all surrounded me and put their hands on my shoulders and back, they began to pray. I heard unfamiliar, intricate dialects quietly spoken by several of them. My mind stayed open in spite of my not understanding their language, I needed God! I began to sweat I was a little scared. I felt something powerful dance through my soul. Suddenly it was as if oceans of living waters were surging through my body making my heart well. Imagine oceans of Love flowing through such a small thing as a human body. This feeling was no shallow experience. I was steady thanking Jesus as they instructed me to do. As a previous drug addict I thought, “My god this cannot be right it feels too good” I had some fear. Then I felt my beloved grandmother, whom was one of the few encouraging figures throughout my childhood, flow through my soul she was there! Then the Love of God flowed through my heart like milk and honey. By that experience, I knew God was real and I had just met Jesus and the Holy Ghost in one large experience. Following this baptism of grace and peace, I felt Love for others and Love for myself.
From “Paradise For the Hellbound”
I have not had an anxiety attack since. I found a fellowship where I actually fit in. I put down cigarettes. Tons of burdens where lifted off my shoulders, I was set free. I sang a new song on my way home that night in tongues. The experience in the church strengthened my faith 100 fold and more. The experience showed me a glimpse of eternity in my heart and soul. This blessed event happened two years after my water baptism, not because I am better or more spiritual than the next man is but because I desperately needed help. Because of my weakness and infirmity, I sought God with my whole heart.
In the book of Acts Chapter 10:44-47 the gentiles were given the gift of the Holy Spirit prior to their water baptisms. Again, God does not go by man’s rules. I say this because I have heard some preachers preach that these baptisms come to man in a certain traditional order. I believe that God sent me Sister Petty and I her to help me understand what supernatural thing had come upon me. When the student is ready and willing, the teacher will appear.
I wish I could tell you the exact recipe to receive a grand spiritual awakening unsurpassed by any in your life, like directions for baking a splendid cake. I can only share my own experience with you and you do as you wish with it. This Holy Spirit blast was not sent because of my own merit. “Seek and you shall find.”
John 14:15-17
“If ye shall ask anything in my name, I will do it. If ye love me, keep my commandments. And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter that he may abide with you forever; Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you.” Read more from Paradise For The Hellbound